•  All through my childhood, I struggled with dark and lonely days. My depression left me in a downward spiral, leaving me with nothing but fear. Everything I did, see, and hear constantly scared me. With my PTSD I was stuck in the middle of a nightmare
    • Locked up in my head, I was completely numb. Everything inside of me was dead with no feelings and no life, with no future, my home (shelter) was a dark echoing cave.
    • I would hibernate by closing my eyes and curling up in a ball – from crippling flashbacks; this was going on every frightening hour.
    • In my preteens I was introduced to drugs
    • Unfortunately I slipped even further and got more stuck in my mental illness.
    • Later on in the following months, I became caught up in theft and vandalism. I was feeling suicidal even started cutting. I trusted no one. Thinking everyone was out to hurt me.
    • I was living with Mother at the time but because of my poor choices I could no longer live with her.
    • I received emergency housing. Although I was grateful for a roof over my head I still struggled to pay bills and buy groceries. I didn’t have the skills to understand or keep a budget so I had to have my mother be my representative payee
    • Thankfully, soon after getting emergency house I was able to receive housing through HUD. I was able to move into the cozy apartment I have today.
    • One day in 2007 a nurse at Valley Behavioral Health suggested I check out a place called Alliance House
    • I went to orientation at Alliance House and that day I was able to open my eyes and ears a bit for the first time.
    • I finally found hope – the kind of hope I only heard some people say, but never really felt. I came by the next day still a bit in my shell and a nervous wreck, for I hadn’t experienced this aspect of mental health services before. Through working with members and staff even if for short periods of time, I started building confidence, self-esteem and friendships.
    • Approximately six months later, I started to become comfortable with people and learned how to trust. With the support of members and staff – I have learned many new tools like:
      • Sobriety and wellness
      • Social and behavioral skills with the support of my Clubhouse community.
      • I felt confident enough to try a transitional employment job in the community
      • I worked with staff to find ways to improve my reading comprehension despite my learning disability and
      • I have been given peer leadership and mentoring opportunities
      • And I even got a chance of a lifetime to attend a Clubhouse conference in Hawaii
  • Alliance House not only can provide actual keys for housing which is the reason why we are here today but for me it has provided the keys I needed for my future.
By |2018-01-08T21:14:54+00:00December 26th, 2017|Uncategorized|Comments Off on My Story by Tracy Allen

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